A TOUGH MONTH AUGUST

ANNA IS ENTERING HOSPICE CARE AT LINN HEALTH

This has been a tough month--this August that began on the 2nd with a request that Hospice be brought in to help with the care of my Aunt Anna.  She had just returned from an emergency stay at RI Hospital ICU where her  breathing difficulties and her sudden seizure activity signaled a real down turn.  I did not realize how anxious it would make me to see her failing.
Anna is so associated with  that whole parental generation. The fact that she is the only one left makes me feel that her loss and changes are another way of losing my mother. Anna shared our lives together and she holds all those memories.

Now I  am so  influenced by her moods and changes. Every time I see her she  is different and I simply don't know what to expect.  I guess that nothing  stays the same and all change is unpredictable, but we think when we are younger that we can predict things and that we have  some control over  events. 
Wrong on both counts--but the illusion  gives us confidence. Now I need to find  a way to be confident that change will be for the best--as we age and weaken that  confidence seems  unrealistic and just plain wrong.
I need some help with this.